2009 Christmas Advents #'s 18-25 just aren't going to happen

The rest of the posts just aren't going to happen. I'm going to post this for 18-25:

I love my family. I loved the time I spent with my children when they were small. I'm glad I took pictures. I'm glad I wrote things down. As for my regrets? I wish I had done more of those things and less of the selfish things that I did do.

Would I push rewind?

Probably not.

I look at Jeni, Al, Fitz and Swede and at the end of the day I'm just tired. There's a reason why most 50 year old women don't have small children. I love 'em! I adore 'em! They amaze me! I feel soft in the heart every day.

They wear me out.

And I'm thankful...that I'm not the one getting up for a 2 am feeding or a nightmare. With my door shut and the reduced hearing in my left ear (I usually sleep on my right side) I don't even hear it.

-------------------------------------------

The next few days are going to be a blur. I hate that. I'm going to be living on Motrin (for fever, aches and pains), Airborn, and Zicam. I'm keeping this bug at bay so far but it's a nasty flu bug. Just watching Jeni still coughing makes me KNOW I don't want this thing.

I have to work today, and part of tomorrow and plan and cook a Christmas Eve dinner for 17 the next day.

I'm looking for Christmas. I hope *it* finds me and the flu doesn't.

2009 Christmas Advent #17

This post kinda reminds me of Fizzy and *his* single mindedness. Right now it has everything to do with CARS. Although, he did start out with balls too. Daniel too moved on to cars and wheels

2009 Christmas Advent #16

BATH TIME

One of the cutest things when the kids were babies was to bathe them in the kitchen sink. I guess it was the whole idea of being small enough to immerse an entire person in such a small tub. That, and I didn't have to bend over to wash them, it was all done at a comfortable level. *Ahhhhh!*

2009 Christmas Advent #15 (Late)

In 1989 we decided to move from No.CA to Utah...jobless...insuranceless...and try to make our way. We didn't do it without inspiration and guidance though. We knew it would work out okay but it would be really hard. My grandmother who had just turned 90 that summer graciously allowed us to live in her home with her during the interim. It was squeezy for about 9 months then we were able to get a home of our own (the one we're in now). I'm so grateful for a patient and loving grandmother. She was an angel then and is a real one now. She died almost 8 years later in her home with love all around her. My children got to know her and still remember her. This was written in a letter to my parents during that time. October 1989
I had it in my mind to write a nice long newsy letter but one of my beloved children is whining and writhing on the floor at my feet and occasionally kicking my chair. Another one has a full can of tinker toys and is trying to wake up Grandma Great by dumping them in her lap. Jason's cake for Pack meeting is staring at me and making me feel guilty because it needs to be frosted. Jeni's pants need a button and a patch, which I promised would be done last week. Jason's pants to his Halloween costume need to be cut out and sewn today because he has to dress up tonight for pack meeting. (So do I, for that matter, I think I'll be a harried housewife.) Stephanie's nose is running like a faucet and Daniel is mad at me because I asked him to pick up his mess BEFORE going out to play. (I must be out of my mind!) So this will have to do.

2009 Christmas Advent #14

This picture was taken about the *time* of the story but not *for* the story. I was too angry at the time to do anything but be angry.
Fall 1985
We were living in Costa Mesa and Jason, Jeni and Daniel were all sharing one room. They were small so it wasn't too crowded. At this time Daniel was probably close to 1, Jeni 3+ and Jason 4+. I believed, and still believe, in afternoon naps. They are good for children but even better for mommies. It gives us a chance to regroup and sometimes even catch up on a little shut-eye ourselves.
This had been an especially trying day and I had fed the children their lunch and was really looking forward to some quiet time. The children knew the drill: eat lunch, have a small drink, story time and...yes...lay down and take a nap. YES!!! I was probably pushing it with Jason, he was a little old, but was going to push it to the very edge if I had to for those 2 hours of bliss.
It went mostly as planned but for some reason it just wasn't getting quiet. I decided to wait and see if they would settle down. They didn't, if anything they only got louder and wilder and more hilarious. "What is going on?" I wondered.
I opened the door and what met my eyes was a little confusing. What is making the air so cloudy? Why are my children so white? (Jason is usually a nice brown color.) What is going on?

The next sense to register was the overpowering but pleasant scent of baby powder. Then I knew. I saw two happily smiling children, covered in a thick layer of white talc, each holding a jumbo container of baby powder.
Just then they demonstrated the skill they had perfected over thee past 20 minutes: If you pound the side of the baby powder container you can make amazing shooting clouds! It was then that I took in the enormity of the mess. It was everywhere!! On everything!! Bedding, toys, clothes, carpet, curtains, and on my baby too!!
I wanted to cry. In fact I think I did, as I lost my temper and yelled, letting them know in clear and certain terms that I WAS NOT HAPPY!! THIS WAS NOT FUNNY!! MY PRECIOUS QUIET TIME WAS RUINED!!
And what about my poor little innocent baby Dano? He was laughing too as he slapped his hands against his crib mattress and watched the clouds rise and slowly settle.

So it was three against one and after a few hours of vacuuming ans wiping up the mess I did see the humor in it. Maybe it was longer than that.

2009 Christmas Advent #13

Dano & Stephie under the desk at Gramma Great's. They thought it was a nice 'house'.

This story really has nothing to do with the picture above except that the 'actors' in the 'play' are the same. I wrote about this experience to my Sweetheart when he was in Utah with Jason and Jeni, getting them into school and looking for a job, and I stayed in CA packing up the apartment and taking care of these two. It was a month long separation. Very difficult for both of us but we each did a lot of growing, and the letters helped.

Letters to Steven:
9/12/89
We went to the library today and Daniel got two books on taking baths??? One is called "No Bath Tonight" and the other one is King Bidgood's in the Bathtub". Stephanie just picked out any ol' two books, but they are cute. She likes to be read to...well, she likes to sit on a lap and be in charge of turning pages. Daniel also picked out an instruction tape called "Kid's Karate". He and Stephanie are practicing right now. I had to leave the room because I was afraid I'd laugh. I wish I had the movie camera. Steph likes to practice the kicks the best but several times now has not been able to make up her mind which foot to use and so ends up trying to use both, then lands on her bum. She always has such a surprised look on her face! But no crying. She just plugs her mouth with her thumb and thinks about it then climbs to her feet and tries again. Daniel is making better progress but is a little self-conscious when I'm in the room. I wish you where here to watch.

I had to put carpet fresh on Daniel's carpet because of his peeing in there. It smelled so bad!! One day when the room had not been aired most of the day and he had wet his bed the night before. I walked in and the smell almost floored me. Daniel walked in and wrinkled his nose and just looked at me. I had had a busy, long, tiring day and in exasperation I said, "This room smells AWFUL! It smells like Stephanie's diaper pail!"

Daniel looks accusingly at Stephanie who looks curiously at her diaper.

Daniel says, "Maybe Stephanie pee-peed in here."

Now he KNOWS who really did it and he knows *I* know.

I said, "There is pee pee on the bed and on the floor, right there, and there, and there!" I said pointing to each place."

Daniel, there is pee pee all over this room!!!" He just stares at me as he holds himself protectively, then looks around and says helpfully, "Well it's not on the ceiling. I didn't pee pee up there."

I tried so hard not to crack up, but he looked so anxious to please me and give me some good news.

Such is the life of a young mother with young children. Oh the joys. I don't think I've ever laughed so much OR been so frustrated. I'm so glad it was a rented apartment and not our home. Ick.

2009 Christmas Advent #12

I loved it that I was able to ask my mom and dad to take care of the kids when I had Daniel. We only lived about 2 hours away so when Daniel was born my folks drove up to Anaheim and picked Jason and Jeni up at the hospital after they met their new little brother. I had a week just getting to know my new little boy and they were able to go to Indio and have fun in the sun in FEBRUARY!! I'll tell you, that wouldn't happen in Utah, at least not like this.

I love these pictures because they're having such a good time, not really missing me at all. It was a nice interlude for them.

In the last picture you can see the poinsettias just losing their blooms. They grew like weeds and when I was a child we had to cut them back every year but we had some gorgeous color at Christmas time.

2009 Christmas Advent #11

Daniel...though he has one of the most tender hearts you can imagine, is a boy's boy/man's man. He loves deeply, is intensely loyal, treats animals with tender loving care and even has a cat named Karen (his choice)...but I'm thinking he should have been born in the Wild West. On the other hand, he would have been one of those who would have disappeared in the wild west-iness and we'd never have seen him again, but books would have been written about him, I'm sure. This picture was taken just after his 5th birthday. The following was written in a letter to my parents.

March 13, 1990

(Excerpt from letter written to Grandparents Wood)

Daniel has his mind made up that on his 8th birthday he's getting a pocketknife. He's making sure that I won't forget. (I'm hoping he will.) He reminds me daily, and drools over the pocketknife display every week at Allens. Yesterday when we were grocery shopping he excitedly dragged me over to the glass case to show me the "pocketknife" that hs his name on it. I look at the cute little knives at the top of the display trying to guess which one has the most gadgets.

"That one, I'm sure, is Daniel's ideal," I think as I look at one of them.

I was disappointed at my mother's intuition when I pointed it out and Daniel didn't even pause when he said, "No, not that one...THAT one!"

I looked at his little pointing finger...pointing at the longest switchblade I've ever seen! I look at Daniel to make sure that this sweet innocent little face is really sweet and innocent. I see visions of this very knife sticking out of Stephanie's little chest, or poking Daniel's eye out, or miscellaneous little fingers laying around the house, and I shudder. All this while Daniel is trying to make me promise that I'll get it for him for his 8th birthday.

I say something vague like, "We'll see..." and I'm saying to myself, "NO WAY! NOT IN A MILLION YEARS!!!"

Daniel is persistent and I'm saying things like, "Maybe, but we'll have to wait and see...you might change your mind...you might see something else you'll like better..."

Pretty soon he's quiet. I take a detour down the toy isle just to get his mind on something else. All is forgotten.

Then...down the juice isle he says, "Mommy?"

"Hmmmm?"

"I've changed my mind." ("Whew!" I think, "Thank you!")

" I want something else when I turn 8," says Daniel.

"Oh yeah? What do you want?" ("Anything," I pray, "Anything but a knife!")

"I decided I want a gun."

!!!

2009 Christmas Advent #10

JASON

...has a great deal of love and affection in his soul. They say that the characteristics that come naturally in a child will manifest themselves permanently in the adult (despite the temporary loss of them in the adolescent years when the child is powered by hormones and peer pressure. GAH!!) Some may take comfort from this and others...

well, might be scared.

I'm one of the comforted ones.

Love has always been a motivating force in this child's life,

and will continue to be so, I'm sure.

And now he has someone else to love, comfort, laugh and grow with.

Isn't this what all mother's want for their children??

Thanks Jen, for taking us on as part of your family. I love you.

2009 Christmas Advent #9

Stephanie...she's always looked like a little angel, especially in Blue...

but there was a mischievous side too.

Hard not to laugh though...too hard.

2009 Christmas Advent #8

Daniel, alias "Dirty Dano", loved the dirt. He loved it wet, dry, cold, hot, up and down. This was taken in my Grandmother's backyard where there was a wet spot due to an underground well. It didn't take long for Dano to find it and make use of it. Needless to say the 'spot' grew into a puddle, which grew into a pit. He played in it every chance he got.


This picture was taken after a trip to a cub scout day camp where his brother had been for the day. I pulled up in the car and went around to get Daniel out of his car seat. I unbuckled him and he leaned over too far and fell to his hands and knees into the softest, smoothest, silkiest dirt he, or I for that matter, had ever felt. In a matter of minutes he was throwing it and crawling through it and burying his cars in it and generally making a mess. This was very common to me and I figured it would be more work and frustration to keep him out of it than just give in and let him be a boy. After about 1/2 hour a member of the bishopric came up to me and asked me to try and stop him as he was filling the air with dirt and it was getting in the food. (I think it was also a bit disconcerting for him as Daniel was making it look like so much fun that his son and a couple of other boys had joined in and were contributing to the mess.) I sighed, grabbed him, and gathered up the rest of my brood and went home. This was what he looked like when we got home. We had to fill the tub three times to get him clean. He looks so dang happy though! Who can resist that grin???

2009 Christmas Advent #7

I'm not quite sure why "The Blanket" becomes so important to a child but I'm sure it has been so for thousands of years. This little crocheted blanket was made when I was pregnant with Jeni. It was the first attempt in many years to do something like that and the irregularities were very apparent. It ended up looking more like a trapazoid than a square but to this little girl it didn't matter at all. And did this warm a mother's heart? Yes, indeed. The blanket was dragged all over California and Utah in her childhood. It's been to Texas and who knows where else. It's still a part of her life. I'm so glad she has a piece of her childhood with her wherever she goes in this wide world, and that may be far and wide considering...

I hope she knows that a mother's love is packed in every strand.

2009 Christmas Advent #6

Children and their fearlessness. The laws of physics don't apply. They never think of consequences. They just move forward with what they want. In this case Jason wanted a toy on the other side of the box, but instead of going around the box, he just goes *over* it, never thinking that the cardboard box might collapse...well, it didn't. Daddy is holding it up with his foot. Jason didn't fall on his face...that time. No wonder their perception of reality is a bit skewed. We just keep bridging the gap for them and they're so single-minded that they never know how close they come to catastrophe every single day!!!

Maybe that's what Heavenly Father does for us...every single day.

2009 Christmas Advent #5

Stephanie is our caboose. Jeni was so excited to get a little sister that she almost cried, and promised to share everything with her and love her.

We even have that on video!
I love it when there's love between the brothers and sisters. They're some of the most important relationships ever. I don't know what I'd do without my own 3 brothers and 3 sisters. I love them dearly.

2009 Christmas Advent #4

I've always found children's artwork really interesting and fun to look at, especially when you can get them to tell you about it. The following was a drawing done by my 4+ year old Daniel who was REALLY into cars. The explanation of the picture was written in a letter to my parents.

June 12, 1989 (A letter to Grandparents)

I just had to send this little picture that Daniel drew this morning. He's finally able to sit down and draw a discernible picture. This is one of his more detailed pictures. Most of them deal with a single subject...Cars. This one contains three subjects. First of all there is a self portrait. As you can tell he has a buzz. He can't stand for his hair to get more than "fuzzy". If it doesn't "fuzz" when you run your hand backwards, from front to back, on the top of his head, it's too long and needs to be buzzed again. I noticed that he even put eyebrows on himself! I commented on this 'first', and he gave me a tolerant smile and said, "Those aren't my eyebrows. Those are my scabs." Sure enough he has two scabs, which will soon be pits, high on his forehead in about the same place. How silly of me!

The second subject is his bicycle. As you can see it has handlebars, a seat, peddle, tires, and if you look closely, you'll see air nozzles on the tires. At first I thought it was 1 spoke. He volunteered their true identity. I'm glad I kept my mouth shut or esle I would have deserved another of his tolerant smiles.

The third subject, of course, is the car, and he's driving it. I was afraid to ask what the little marks are beside the wheels but I did anyway. They are the 'SHHHHHHHH' sound the car makes when it's going.

This child has one of the most contagious and engaging smiles of anyone I know.

Our Dano.

2009 Christmas Advent #3

Jeni and babies...As I've watched Jeni with her babies and heard her say, "She's just so TINY!!" There was a time when babies weren't so tiny for her. She was almost 3 when her baby brother Daniel was born. He was just shy of 9 pounds. Jeni got to hold him in the hospital when he was just hours old. He wasn't what you'd call a "tiny" baby but he was still little, but he looks giant compared to his 2 year 9 month old sister! See the difference now?

2009 Christmas Advent #2

The Rootbeer Story:

And that's all I have to say about that.

2009 Christmas Advent

This should be Day One, but I came up with the idea late so...here we go.

For this year's advent it took me a while to come up with an idea. As I've been around Jeni and her children it brought back so many memories that I thought I'd do an Advent using some of my favorite pictures and/or stories of my children. So...a day late, here is#1.

Remember Kindergarten and that first day of school? Awwww....

Memory Lane...it lasts a lifetime.